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A Christmas Offering: Mike’s Updates December 2074

Greetings of the season,

I know, I know. You haven’t heard from me in a while, right? I offer my apologies or accept your thanks. It all depends on your point of view. And what, you may ask, has kept me so quiet for so long? In my last communication, I told you I was trying hard to complete the first draft of Blind Switch, my third suspense novel, before a self-imposed Christmas deadline. Alas, I’m pretty sure at this point that Santa will deliver long before I’m ready to. Despite significant progress, I still have a ways to go. On the plus side, I’ve managed to lure my two bad guys not only to the same state but into the same New York City borough. Rest assured. Justice will be served… as soon as I can figure out how to do it. Such are the joys of being a discovery writer. I suppose I could try planning ahead but that would spoil the surprise.

I’d like to thank all those who took advantage of my A Shot at Redemption free book promotion. My plan was to attract a bunch of new readers and, in doing so, get some new reviews, hopefully of the favorable variety. Well, I’m happy to report that exactly half of my plan worked brilliantly. A couple hundred copies of my novel were downloaded. That’s fantastic! It would be even better if at least one member of my newly discovered audience would take a moment to post some sort of a comment. That hasn’t happened yet and I think I know why. Obviously, those people were all so impressed they immediately purchased other Michael Sova titles and are busy reading those now. It makes sense; and for my fresh hoards of adoring fans, I’ve got some good news.

Beginning this Friday, December 15th, I am kicking off what the Amazon Kindle Store refers to as a Countdown Deal. This time, I am promoting Parlor City Paradise, and I’m making it available for the lowest price EVER! Here’s the catch, which isn’t really a catch at all. If you want the biggest savings you’ve got to act fast. The novel will be priced at $.99 on day #1, $1.99 on day #2, $2.99 on day #3, and $3.99 on day #4. It’s back to regular price after that and you’ll feel very silly if you wait that long.      It’s a good read and makes for a great gift idea too. Remember, my Countdown Deal starts Friday. Here’s the link.

https://www.amazon.com/Parlor-City-Paradise-Michael-Sova-ebook/dp/B01FGEJQKO/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1512562758&sr=8-1

In parting, I’d like to share a brief yet seasonally appropriate excerpt from my 21 Sundays of Fantastic Football Food cookbook. Please enjoy, and Merry Christmas!

Mike S.

 

     “You’re a three-decker sauerkraut and toad stool sandwich with arsenic sauce.” If that sounds vaguely familiar, it’s a line from “You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch,” the most familiar song from Dr. Seuss’s How the Grinch Stole Christmas. Odd lyrics for a Christmas song, right? You might also be wondering what the hell it has to do with football. Allow me to explain.

     It’s a little known fact that the song was adapted from a tune originally written for the New York Jets. Okay, that’s not entirely true but it could be.   After all, Dr. Seuss was a huge Jets fan. Why do you think he made the Grinch green? He was honoring his favorite team. After a while, though, he tired of watching them “stink, stank, stunk,” week after week after week. He started cracking up, his literary genius quickly deteriorating to utter gibberish. “They’ll blow their flarfloovers and hit their tartinkers. They’ll play their harhoovers and bang their garginkers.” Would a sane man write something like that? The answer is no.

     Eventually, Dr. Seuss gave up writing altogether. He became a recluse and would only go to Jets games disguised as a New York City fireman. It didn’t help. The team was still dreadful and his condition worsened. He might have gone completely off the deep end had his therapist not suggested he use his artistic gifts to deal with his pain and frustration by some creative means. He took the advice to heart, picked up his pen and immediately got to work.    

     The first version of the song was admittedly a bit rough. In fact, the original title was “You Stupid Sons of Bitches,” and it was really nothing more than a solid string of well-rhyming profanity. But, it made him feel a lot better. Seuss rewrote, reworked and revised, Nantucket became Mount Crumpet, and eventually he came up with something he could work with. Over time, his poem of torment and failure became one of the most beloved Christmas stories ever. He even managed to keep a few of the original lyrics. “You’re a bad banana with a greasy black peal.” “Your heart’s a dead tomato splotched with moldy purple spots.” And, “Your soul is an appalling dump-heap, overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable, mangled up in tangled up knots” are all holdovers from the very first draft of the song. Dr. Seuss sadly passed away early in the 1991 season but his legacy lives on.    

 

 

 

 

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